Grateful

I am so proud of my parent...
Today papa came school to sign the agreement of NTU Study Loan.
After signing, I brought papa walked around place where I live.
Eating at Canteen 2, papa chose forgot what rice :)
I can feel that papa so close to me.
Papa is always concerned our four xiao gua, although the tone he used sometimes is unacceptable.
But I always think that it's ok, papa wants to express something his feeling on the basis he don't know how to choose tone and words.
So blessful I have a complete family.
I must be a good person in my previous life so that I never sufferring till now ( 19 years )


I am so shameful of myself.
If papa and mama have money to study, they must be top student.
Our previous generation don't have so much chance for them to change their life.
But they still hold strictly at their moral judgement.
I am so shameful of myself.
In Ntu I am not hardworking enough.
Why?
Do I change my attititude?


How I get this chance to study in Ntu.
Just lucky only loh.
If not sister urged me to apeal my application, I almost gave up .
So this chance belonged to sister.
I know she endure a hardship in poly,
I know how she not gan1 xing1 her education and time waste in poly.
Maybe I don't know what the real feeling like,
MANY MANY things was helped by my siblings.
My family...
I cherish ...

How I can get a good life for my family and earn lots of money?
First Honour Degree right?
So now onwads, never give up any chance you can learn ,YANG PEI YUN!!!

The chance studying in Ntu not your effort,YANG PEI YUN
it is papa ,mama, sister,hao and long 's effort.
With their help, I can study a higher degree not in my expectation.
So all you do is for their sake,
NEVER LET THEM DOWN.

I am Really Useless

How poor my english it is .even no confidence to comunicate to ppl.
How useless I am still unable to perform well in certain aspect.
Nothing I can proud of.
Nothing I can do well even though how hard I work hard.
I Yang Pei Yun haven't found my ego personality till now.
How uneasy I am.

You noe how I envy those ppl can tok out their thinking so unfear and loudly.
I wonder where they got these braveness.
Y I can't speak out my thinking completely?
Is it something problem with my logical thought and analysis?
If it is true ,what is the problem?
How I can improve it?
What method do I use to improve?

Once,I was taught to be quiet so that less conflict I can get well with ppl.
Just shut up and do your own thing .
Don"t give any opinion if you are not expert in it.
But I found that this kind of survival way I chose was wrong.
It is a timid way like tortise trying to protect itself from any trouble.
But in another perspective, it is I trying to protect myself from getting hurt.
I am so insecure .
I know nothing will remain forever even friendship or love.
In the end ,you still alone to face the challenge.
You still depend on your own.
Maybe you will think how narrow-minded I am.
But don't you think every words from mankind are so insincere and hypocritical?
Ppl like to speak those beautiful and so surface word.
So I just take as joking for those.

I think
That is the reason why...
There is always a distance between me and my friend.
Maybe I need to change.^^

南大纵横社

追溯一个月前,
那天看见南大辩论社在招生活动,
就想：有知识的交流也挺好的,
下意识就冲去参加了.

上完课,大约七点钟,到面试地点.（南大超大的，喘！）
经过二轮的面试，
摸不找脑袋，拿到一个很深奥的演讲题目：一念一死生，你到底是谁？
哈？啥米意思？
讲什么好呢..
显掉，开始计划跑路。
向来行动力零的我，结果没有跑啦，
进去乱哈啦一堆屁话，
就出来了。
结果晚上公布。
进了.


就这样开始我的辩论训练日子。
里面有好多好多的中国人（９０％）,
个个都超有想法的，
嘴里的尽是中国的口音，
心里开始怕起来了。
果然到现在我是队里最弱的。(sad arr)
大家的思维超快的.


不行！！！
不能这样算了，
赶紧追上大伙儿，
一天追一点，
tortise will reach finishing line one day...
Don't worry :)